Interviews and Outerviews

Posted: August 20, 2012 in Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

Currently I’m reviewing resumes and scheduling interviews. A few things made me laugh because I thought they would be common sense. They’re not.

Obviously it’s not common sense if I have to post this so in the interest of sharing and making fun teaching, let me give you some pointers based on what I’ve run across.

If I post an ad for a position online, do not send me a blank email saying that you’re interested and to call you. Send your resume.

If you DO reply to the job posting, I would suggest you put the position in the subject. I may have more than one position available and don’t know which one you’re applying for.

If you don’t have reliable transportation, do not apply for a job.

If the hours I advertise for the position clearly state that it requires nights and weekends, don’t tell me during the pre-screening over the phone that you are looking for a Monday through Friday 9:00 – 5:00 job.

During the phone screening, fight the urge to speak to me in ebonics. I assure you I WON’T call back for an interview.

Always have an email address specifically for things like this. If your email reads something like “nigga”, “mafia”, “goddess”, “dick” or “69” I am unlikely toΒ  bother.

Be mindful of what you have online. Always assume that someone will look you up. I do. If you have photos pretending to be a thug (holding weapons, dressed like a wannabe gangster or with your whole ass hanging out) I’m not likely to call you.

If you have ads online for prostitution and/or porn, don’t tie them into the same email you apply for a job. It makes for good office conversation, but I’m not hiring an escort or a porn star. I’m the only porn star allowed in the office.

  1. rebecca2000 says:

    Oh man…sigh. I really wanted to apply for the eonics prostitute job in the position of 69 dude. My car doesn’t work but sometime my pimp can get me there between 9-5. Sometimes he is too drunk to work. You can look us up on facebook , I am in the picture with the ak47. You’re a buzz kill.

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