I usually write my horoscope and thoughts about it as a tongue in cheek way of making fun of astrology.

I laughed the other day because I saw a place mat at work with this on it:

In case you are unable to read it, I have included it below. With my thoughts of course.

Rich in wisdom (FILTHY rich in wisdom) and charm (hmm let’s call it a bit pedestrian as far as charm goes), you are romantic (Ro.. roman.. I don’t even know what that word means) and deep thinking (Very much so. Deep thinker, though I’m never deeper in thought than when in the gutter. See what I did there? Sigh.. never mind) and your intuition guides you strongly (Yes. My intuition guides me strongly, but that’s not to say it guides me CORRECTLY. It’s like a broken compass). Avoid procrastination (I will. Later) and your stingy attitude towards money (You get a divorce and get screwed with bills and tell me if you think it’s stingy!). Keep your sense of humor about life (That I do and have done so better and better. Life is funny and most things are subjective. Control your perception and you can change your world). The Snake would be most content as a teacher (Hell no. I had tons of teachers who were dicks. I have friends who are teachers. While I appreciate my friends doing that, it’s not for me. No thank you), philosopher (But I AM a philosopher! All I’m missing is a toga), writer (It’s on my new to do list – and so are you hehe), psychiatrist (Psychology sounds significantly more interesting), and fortune teller (I’m practically a fortune teller already! You’re gonna laugh. See? I told you. That’ll be $10. Mr. Jones and me practically look into the future..).


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