Article: Men biggest first date complaints

Posted: March 22, 2013 in Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ,

Let’s see what I can help you  guys with.

It had been a while since an “article” caught my attention. This one is supposed to be Men’s Biggest First Date Complaints”. Something tells me men would only complain about one thing after a date, but we’ll see.

Let’s face it. The first date is a test (Test? A first date is a job interview). Unfortunately, many of us go about it the wrong way by trying to figure out everything our companion is doing wrong to disqualify him instead of looking at everything he’s doing right. Following are the seven most common first date mistakes, based on what my male clients have told me after going on dates with women.

Being late with no warning
Now, if you’re going to be more than five minutes late for a date and you don’t call or text, it’s a fail on your part. (Oh, come on. This is so general that it’s stupid. This applies to a class, a course, your job, an appointment, a booty call, boarding a train and so on and so on) Showing up late starts the date off terribly and sets a bad tone. It conveys a lack of importance. We prioritize what’s important in our lives by how much time (and money) we dedicate to it. That being said, either aim to arrive on time or just call the moment you realize you’re going to be late. Good manners can go a long way.

Dressing inappropriately
Real talk: Being underdressed, overdressed or inappropriately dressed translates as being pretentious, not fun or easy (Who determines that it is appropriate or not? If she dressed that way she thinks it’s appropriate. Why would she have to dress in the way she thinks the guy wants her to as opposed to however the hell she’s comfortable?) . On a date, especially right after work, many women often forget to dress sexy. Your business causal outfit is not hot. Conversely, don’t wear close to nothing either. Just because he’s salivating doesn’t mean he “likes” your attire. Lastly, if the date is an activity like a hike, forgo the heels and mini-dress because you think they look cute. Always dress appropriately for the moment (If you wear hells and a mini dress to hike, you shouldn’t go out on a date or breed).

Poor eye contact and fake smiles

Having poor eye contact and flashing fake smiles send the wrong messages (Yet again, poor eye contact and fake smiles don’t even have much of a place any time, particularly on a date). The saying goes, “Eyes are the windows to our souls

(That’s a such a stupid saying. You don’t even know if a soul exists)

.” If you limit eye contact because you’re looking away, you simply don’t look confident in yourself. Also, fake smiles are fairly easy to spot. Give too many inauthentic smiles and you enter the “looks like a stalker” category. Eye contact should be focused on the person with whom you’re talking. Be sure to mix in a few nods and eye blinks

(Really?)

. The rule of thumb

is short single nods are most effective; it shows that you’re listening. Double or triple nods make it seem as if you’re trying to speed the person up

(What about quadruple nods? Slow nods?)

.

Phone addictions

One of the biggest mistakes made on a date is using your cellphone or placing it on the table and glancing at it every time you get a message

(Again, this applies to so many things other than a date. And who knows what she does for a living? Maybe she HAS to ensure the message isn’t from work. Guys won’t look so deeply into this unless she’s fingering her phone all night heh)

. This can show you are disinterested in your date. When you’re on a date, please keep your cellphone in your purse or pocket. Your date deserves your full attention

(I put my cell phone on the table. It could be work or an emergency. Just don’t use it without necessity)

Poor manners

If you’re rude to others, it shows that you have poor social skills and aren’t a very nice person

(Is that right? This has made things very clear) Noth

ing makes a date want to run away like a rude and impolite person 

(Why would you go out with them in the first place? Was it a blind date? Otherwise you knew it beforehand) 

If you’re on your date and the waiter forgot the extra lemon wedges, and before the waiter is out of earshot, you shout “Stupid M****…” That ain’t nice! And, it will make your date wonder how you will treat him or her in a relationship

(Not really. That’s more like pointing out that you’re a dick. You don’t even consider what would happen if you were in a relationship) 

As in life, when on a date treat everyone the way you would want to be treated

(Now THAT is deep)

I’m living in the future so my present is my past. My presence is a present kiss my ass

– Kanye West

Talking about your ex

By making frequent mentions of your past relationships, you might be conveying that you’re not over your ex.

(That doesn’t even matter. Don’t speak about your ex. Simple. The girl you’re potentially going to date does not care to hear it)

Living in the past is extremely dangerous

(Living in the past is dangerous, unhealthy and counter productive)

. If you can’t stop talking about how great the old flame was or how you enjoyed the things you both did, chances are you still wish you were in that moment

(Trust me. Right now there’s probably 3 dicks in your girlfriend. Let it go)

. Do yourself (and your date) a favor and admit you’re not yet ready for a new relationship

(Do it prior to a date. Never lie about it. Even if you tell people beforehand, they always seem to want to force you into it, though so beware)

.

Not knowing the B.B.R. (belly button rule)

B.B.R. stands for the Belly Button Rule 

(This sounds stupid as fuck already) 

. This is my favorite rule 

(And yet somehow I don’t feel surprised)

, and one I talk about in-depth at my coaching sessions. It is the most telling and compelling of all body language tactics. The direction our belly button faces reflects our attitude and our emotional state 

(HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! This is so ridiculous)

. When we face our navel toward someone, we’re subconsciously saying we’re interested in the person or the conversation. Face your navel away, and you’re saying “get me the hell out of this.” (So if they’re facing you, they’re interested and if they’re facing away from you they’re not? Brilliant. You must be one incredible “coach” with this bizznatchery) Most people do not know this rule 

(Because it doesn’t exist or make sense, asshole)

, so learn and master it, and you’ll be able to better read and control your interactions. Not listening shows disrespect and is the most passive-aggressive form of disrespect. Listen to your date. 

(Huh? What did you say?)

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