Another day another hollllaaa!

Yep. In that type of mood. It’s Thursday – still my scheduled day off – and I haven’t changed out of my pajamas. Blogging with Led Zeppelin in the background. Dyer Maker to be exact or “the orgasm song” as my friend once called it due to the “oh oh oh’s..” sigh. Bad joke, though I never forgot it.

“I’m a paradox. I want to be happy, but I think of things that make me sad. I’m lazy yet I’m ambitious. I don’t like myself, but I also love who I am. I say I don’t care, but I really do. I crave attention, but reject it when it comes my way. I’m a conflicted contradiction. If I can’t figure myself out, there’s no way anyone else has.”

Where to start… Yet again I have fallen off the healthy eating wagon. This time it was not intentional. I kept putting off going to the grocery store and by the time I absolutely had to, I didn’t have enough money for groceries. I had enough to buy food, but not do groceries. I bought nasty ass, fatty food for today and tomorrow, though I will be able to do groceries again by the weekend.

I’m going to tighten these habits up. I will even give running a shot again despite the pain. I know I won’t last long, but I love running and I miss it. Cycling is not bad, but running somehow just FEELS better. Running is like finally having sex with that one sexy girl you’ve wanted and lusted after for a very long time. Cycling is like wanting to have sex because you haven’t in a long time and winding up with some average 6 from a crusty, dim lit bar and wake up smelling like cigarettes and cheap beer.

I also found that I got better results from jogging than I did cycling. It took longer to get the same workout via bicycle. On a similar note, I occasionally have people ask me about my “diet”. Look, fuckers. I am not, have not and will not be on a diet. I’m not anti-diet. If you want to lose weight for a certain date, diets are great. What I try to do is change my eating habits so that I eat healthy. It’s not the same thing. I’ve started lifting light weights but my right elbow area still pops. I don’t know how well this experiment will go.

As far as work is related, I’m still at my thankless job. In fact, I ignored a shitload of work-related phone calls today. I don’t know why it’s hard to understand that I get to have days off and that the company does not and will not pay for my cell phone? If I’m not in the office and someone is not dying, dead or the building is on fire, do not call me. If someone is dying, dead or the building is on fire, you should call the police or the fire department first. THEN maybe me.

Anyway, I have gone to another interview and had another rescheduled. The job I’ve been waiting to hear from postponed their decision again. This time until the end of this coming week. It’s good to know I’m still in the race, but it’s a bit unnerving it’s between just two people. I’ll feel terrible if I don’t get it. I hate to lose and I love to compete. Speaking of which, it’s becoming more and more clear that a coworker wants to try and establish some sort of dominance or have a pissing contest. I’m not sure why people like that gravitate towards me. I already gave people the warning that the next time she gets out of pocket, I’m putting her right back in it. People seem to have an inability to just BE ¬†without fucking with other people.

As far as my “love” life is concerned, I hate to tell you that the person that was in discussions to fill the vacant seat of friends with privileges has withdrawn her application. Too bad. She looked delicious; like a two piece and a biscuit. At this stage, I think I’m forgetting how to have sex and what goes where. This is not looking good and yet I still adamantly refuse to be in a relationship. I was told by a friend that I lead people on by flirting with them. I’m not sure how that translates into interest in a relationship.

Anyway, April is around the corner. I have gotten some things accomplished as I wanted, but time is flying and I need to speed up. I’m completely motivated to continue with the things I put on my list. I’m still doing the math work. It’s tedious and oh so boring, but it is helping and I won’t stop until I have reached the point I need to be in. On April 1st I’m scheduled to meet my “little” to determine if we are a match. I’m a bit nervous, but it’ll pass. It’s on my list so it has to get done.

The fair is in town so I intend to go probably Saturday night. I think I’ll do the same thing I did with the Renaissance Festival where I went on my own so I could go at my own pace and wander aimlessly as I see fit with my headphones on. Hopefully I can schedule another day to go with my nephews, though.

I have a friend coming to see me in mid April. I haven’t seen her in ages so I’m sure we will have fun. I’ll make sure we hit a couple of my favorite stomping grounds.

Finally in late April is my birthday. It’s on a Saturday so if I’m unlucky enough to be at my current job, I’ll request the day off. It’s bad enough I hate my birthday, but I will not work on that day. So far I think I’ll turn off my phone, buy some wine, snatch up my dogs and go to a pet friendly beach close to downtown and just kind of chill. Eventually I can find my way home to drop the dogs off, find a new bar to go to and treat myself to birthday booze. We’ll see. In my life I’ve found that things can change drastically and dramatically in an instant. Fortunately I understand this to be purely tentative.

In closing, I always keep tabs on my stats for my blog. Can someone tell me how in the world one of the search engine terms that led someone to my blog is “masturbation “whole family” fun”???


Give me your damn input!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s