Moms Snappy Lobsters

Posted: June 4, 2013 in Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

I really hate spam. I wish there was no spam in the world. Not the canned one and not the email kind.

I mean, I like lobster, but fuck.
Lee to Lobster spam:
My mom LOVES lobster! My stepmom has crabs. Do you ship internationally? I only ask because my Mom lives in Hawaii. Thanks.
Duncan Manutz
Lobster spam to Lee:
We ship to HI– it is an extra charge. A permit is required for live lobsters, not lobster tails.

We do not ship outside of the USA due to custom laws. thanks for visiting– have a nice weekend.
Lee to Lobster spam:
So if I wanted to ship my mom lobsters can I order them live and snappy? I don’t want just the tails. It’ll be totally funny. Then she can eat them.
Lobster spam to Lee:
Hawaii: Permits are required. Please review state regulations for importing live seafood. I think it is $20 for the permit. If we do not receive a copy of the permit– the package will be held by the Dept of Agriculture. No permit required for frozen items.

Surcharge: An additional fee applies for orders shipping to Hawaii. Saturday fees still apply.
Lee to Lobster Spam:
Are permits required in total or one per lobster? Can I be billed for it? Ideally I want them as snappy as possible.
Lobster Spam to Lee:
The recipient would have to get the permit in HI and email us a copy– good for a bunch of lobsters. If you would like to apply for a permit to ship LIVE seafood into the State of Hawaii, the recipient should contact his or her local Hawaiian City Hall or Customs location
Unfortunately, the government offices in HI work slow– so it can take up to a week to receive.

Please refer to this website: http://hawaii.gov/hdoa/Info/doa_importing for information.

Lee to Lobster Spam:
I don’t have the ability to see images from my Amiga Commodore, but I read something on your site about “Whale of a Tail?” Is that true? If so, what type of whale tail is this? Is it the whole tail? I don’t want to pay too much.
Duncan Manutz

Commodore_Amiga2000_System_1

Lobster Spam to Lee:
Whale of a Tail features (2) 16-20 oz. Lobster Tails. Here is your total.
Item Summary SKU Description Qty Price Subtotal WT02
Whale of a Tail 2 Colossal Tails 1 $119.00 $119.00
Subtotal $119.00 Overnight Delivery $20.00Tax $0.00 Final Total $139.00

Lee to Lobster Spam:
You know, when I read “colossal” all I can think of is my mom eating a giant lobster screaming “release the Kraken!” Too funny.
Duncan Manutz

Lee to Lobster Spam (after receiving more mail):
Do you have vegetarian lobster? Like soy? Slobster? Or Tofu? Tofster? Tempe? Tempobster? Is it kosher?
Duncan Manutz

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Comments
  1. […] This hurt my pride. Was it me? Something I said? Where are the Kojo Michael’s of the world? Snappy Lobsters? Sweet, thoughtful men like Pastor James Harry??? Is Madam Safia Farkash Gaddafi thinking about me […]

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