Live Until You Die

Posted: December 29, 2013 in Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ,

Not sure where it came from.

We already know that I’m not a big New Year resolution guy. It confuses me. It amuses me that people feel pressured into trying to make changes this time of year (albeit temporarily) when they should do it as they go for self improvement. I never really do any resolutions strictly because it seems like the best way to fail at it is to do it because it’s a new year. That said, I received a little piece of advice recently.

you seem to have an expectation that life will be easy and you should be happy every day (hmm you know what? yeah. I kind of like that).  let go of that (damn it. there that goes): don’t take too seriously the expectation nor the realization that it ain’t gonna happen every day (that much I have concluded. it’s a bit of a cluster fuck in my zoo).  it will happen some days, just not every day.  just figure out what you need to do to attain whatever short term goals you might have that take you toward (or at least don’t get in the way of) your longer term goals, and keep on making progress (I’m down with that. I guess I lose sight of that at times. And perhaps a bit too often lately).  some days you’ll feel like you did okay, others you won’t, but so what.  you are young (Young-ish, sir. Young-ish) and you still have tomorrow, and whatever else happened, you prolly learned something today (Very true).  quit complaining (I imagine it comes across like a complaint, but I think – THINK – it’s more of an observation. who the fuck knows? You’re probably right and it’s a bitchy complaint), lower your expectations if necessary, and try again tomorrow (I like that perspective);  it’s coming, whether you feel good about it or not, so you might as well look forward to it (Not sure what “it” is, but it appears inevitable)!  life ain’t all fun, it ain’t all pain, and it’s better than the alternative regardless (That’s unproven and unprovable, but I get it)!  god damn, live until you die, lizzle! (You know what? You fucking rock. Thanks. I had a very bad one last night and this actually made me feel good today for some strange reason.)

You know what? I’m  taking this one to heart. I had a pretty bad time last night. I wound up drowning it out with whiskey and cigarettes. I hated that I did, but it is what it is. I’ve reaffirmed I don’t want to continue smoking – man that smell the next day is a motherfucker. I like this perspective. It’s things like this that make me think constantly. I repeat them in my mind like a mantra. I really do. Thanks!! I will refocus (more like re-re-re-refocus, but who’s counting?)

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