It had been a while since I did one of these.

Not that it matters. I post most of my life on Facebook anyway. I know for a fact that I have people who are not on my Facebook who read my blog in the same way that I have people on my Facebook that dislike and do not read my blog. That’s my excuse to post it here as well.

I think this whole new job I accepted started in November. I was thrilled, but I had to keep the information to myself because it was a long process. It also was a “tentative” job offer so I kind of had to keep it to myself until it was official. It sure has taken me months to get this started. Looking back, I can’t believe they wanted me to start on February 10th originally. I’m glad that I recognized that timetable to be a bit too close. I was right because as it is, I have until March 1st to start my new job and I’m not where I’m supposed to be as far as my move.

Don’t get me wrong, there has been tons of progress, but it has been slow. I’m not the type of person that will call people for help, rather I prefer to wait and see if they volunteer it. Unsurprisingly there were few offers and even some of those were bullshit – I’m not an idiot, people. I just like to play one for humor’s sake (coincidentally I re-read this sentence and I had to correct a typo so maybe it’s up in the air after all).

Getting things ready for relocation essentially on my own has been far more challenging than I thought. The though was basic: throw some shit out, box some stuff and get the fuck out. Simple. Turns out that you can accumulate a ton of stuff throughout the years. Trying to figure out what’s worth keeping, what’s worthless and what has enough sentimental value to take up space is more complicated than I thought. Keep in mind two things: 1) I’ve never done a relocation like this. 2) I don’t consider myself the sentimental type of guy. Even then, I ran into things, useless things, that took me to moments in my past that I enjoyed. There weren’t that many of them so it was difficult to let go of some things. In the end I believe it was for the best. Given my history (and that encompasses every day of my life until recently) I think the very best thing to do is just starting anew.

I won’t forget the things I learned in the process of living those things, but they’re always tied up into something that leaves a bad taste. It’s kind of like a nasty ass medicine. The way I see things, I’m moving to a place I’ve never been, people I’ve never met, a brand new (upgraded) job and a brand new place to live. It has tons of potential. I figure the last thing I want to do is track the mud of my history into my new carpet.

That said, I wondered what the best way to leave would be. The reality is that I have very limited amount of time anyway. I can’t plan things out very well because I realistically don’t know what I will be working on at that time. There are one million little details and I can’t afford a mistake. The strange thing is that people seem to think that I owe them to see them before I go. I need to go out of my way to reach out, plan something out and meet up with people prior to my move or I’m an asshole. Well, guess what? I’ll be the asshole. I lack the vocabulary to explain just how unlikely that is. It’s not that  I don’t care. I do. But only one of us is leaving, only one of us is trying to get it all done individually and thinking that I would consider the thought of going through all those motions amidst all this whirlwind is just comical. People should know me better than that.

On the job end, as I mentioned, I’m expected to report to my first day on March 10th. I’m just a tiny bit nervous, though I’m sure that will increase as the time gets nearer. I’m nervous because it’s a great opportunity and everything around me will be brand new. I’m not worried about my ability to perform. I had to throw that out there to offset the usual “you’ll do great” privates messages. Thank you. I will.

The other common joke I hear is the cold. I have sat through countless varieties of “it’s  cold” “Miami/Panama are warm” “you’ll freeze”. I know it’s cold. Trust me I have been monitoring the weather for months. When I have gone on winter vacations, I have thoroughly enjoyed the cold. When it gets down to the 50’s in Miami, running is fantastic. The reality is that going through it for short periods of time is absolutely not the same thing as living in it. I’m very well aware. Small price to pay. In fact, I’ve often wondered what I’ll do in a year. In one year I would be scheduled for a grade increase. At that point in time, I would like to have an idea of where I’d like to go. The idea of moving around regularly doesn’t appeal to me (though I would consider doing that for good money) as much as settling down somewhere. I wonder if I’ll suddenly be open to the idea of returning to South Florida? Who knows? I have no clue what my life will be in a year. It’s all brand new territory and I have no established precedent.

On my fitness end, I’ve partially been slacking. I’ve eaten poorly far more often than usual since I can’t really go and do major groceries. I’ve slacked on my ab workout for no real good reason. I have been running though. I actually hit 8 miles recently. It still surprises me that I can do that. I wanted to do 8 miles tonight, but lately I’ve been smoking again and my body was not going to allow that to happen.

On the relationship end there’s nothing to report. Since November I realized that trying to date when I’m leaving would be pointless. The thought sucked, but it wasn’t as though there was anything in Miami with any potential. I just don’t like having the option to do things essentially taken from me. It makes me want it more.

I’m not giving any great details, but I admit that I started talking to someone from my past. I only mean from my past because they were around then. I don’t think we ever had any interaction. She unfortunately lives over 7 hours away from my new place, but I couldn’t stop. The more I knew about this girl the more I realized we were similar in even the smallest quirkiest of ways. It was weird, but in a fascinating way. It really didn’t hurt that I think she’s absolutely magma level hot. It was great for a while. It had been a long time since I was looking forward to hearing from someone or had any degree of interest in someone (other than chokey). Sadly, that ran it’s course and for reasons I won’t really discuss (no, don’t ask), it concluded. I had allowed myself to wonder if something could come out of it. That alone was interesting to me. The outcome still sucks because at least personality-wise I think it would work out. And she’s really hot. It all matters little because the brief moment concluded, as they all seem to, and I’m back to business.

Valentine’s Day came and went. This was the least bitter I’ve been in years. A friend decided to have a party for the singles. I immediately thought it was absolutely brilliant. I realized that my options and my willingness to do something on that day would be small so I figured that would be the case for everyone else. I was right.

I got there a bit early and had some of the awesome snacks my friend put out.

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What’s Valentine’s Day without a nice spread (see what I did there)? I started feeling awkward early on because the first person to arrive was a guy. In my mind I thought “for fuck’s sake, I’m socially awkward and now I have to chill with a guy”? Don’t get me wrong, the guy was friendly and all, but there’s never a cell in my body that volunteers to speak to strange men. Hell, I barely speak to the ones I actually do know. Eventually another guy came in. Now we were a trio. Almost a band; and me without my maracas.

The rest of the people finally showed up, which begs the question: if everyone shows up fashionably late, are you still fashionably late? I don’t think so. My friend purposely did a good job of ensuring there were a good number of guys and girls. No guy likes a sausage soiree and I imagine girl’s wouldn’t have cared for whatever the opposite is (taco tea time?) they likely wouldn’t have enjoyed being in a house full of men either, like visitation rights in a jail or something. How she pulled it off, I’m not sure but it was masterful. The door opened and like Noah’s Ark, one of everything came through the door. Party time?

Needless to say I immediately retreated to the balcony to stay away. Look, I always mention “socially awkward.” It isn’t a joke. It’s my life. I just become uncomfortable and practically hide. If the place was bigger I would have found a farther corner to ostracize myself into. The highlight of my night was when a group (herd? gaggle?) of girls came in and I crossed the threshold of the sliding door from the balcony to introduce myself and promptly retreated. One of the girls came out to violate my privacy chat. My first thought was that she was cute so what was the harm in entertaining myself. OK, not true. My first thought was “black dress, red lipstick. I kind of dig it”. I’ve entertained hot boring chicks before so I felt more comfortable.

Early in the conversation I realized that this girl was actually intelligent and had a particularly sharp wit. I privately swallowed my own thoughts of “cute but boring” and found myself amused at the fact that I was enjoying myself. I have no idea how long we were speaking, but it was great. I rarely get to go tit for tat with wit and we just talked about any and everything. Turns out she was a local which surprised me as I was certain that awesome, hot local girls were extinct. The friends were very nice as well, but had the subtlety of a train. “Would you like a drink?” one asked the girl. “No, thanks. I’m fine” red lipstick said. “No, but are you OK” the friend emphasized. Red lipstick couldn’t hide the laugh and said she was fine. “Oh, OK. Just checking.” Smooth move lady. Next time text her. It’s less obvious.

I was flattered that she deemed herself OK since that meant I was determined to not be of any immediate threat. At some point I went for a refill of my drink. While in the kitchen, a very slightly intoxicated (but otherwise sweet) girl chatted me up. By chatted me up I mean, practically kept me on location forcibly. I was looking for a polite “out” to keep talking to Red Lipstick, but I couldn’t find it. Chalk it up to ring rust. At some point Red Lipstick sat on the couch with her group of friends and some guys. They were pretty engaged, but I kept on wanting to put a spoon in my eye when I kept noticing Red Lipstick continuing to look in my direction.

By the time I had freed up, the party turned to the balcony and I didn’t want to join. The last interaction I managed to have with Red Lipstick was to wave goodbye as they left. I would have loved to go out for a drink and actually chat without the noise. Try as I may I was unable to get her information from someone after the fact. I don’t have the words to say how much that sucks. I’ve been in Miami since 1997 and I’ve met only a handful of people with that type of personality. I was foolish enough to not have asked her when I had the chance and I was idealistic enough to think I could do so afterwards. I wish I could clone myself so I could shank myself.

Eventually I wound up hanging out with two other girls. They were very sweet, quirky and funny as well. I wound up enjoying the hell out of the attention I had received. Hell, everyone seemed to remember my name. It was odd in a good way. The party died down and I went home both satisfied and dissatisfied by the evening. It was a quick reminder that I’m rustier than tenement nail.

So here I am now, post 7 mile + run. I found 4 beers (no worries. 140 calories each) and figured I’d sit outside by the front porch one of the last few times and share my life. It’s not always boring and it’s not always (I hope) going to be swings and misses. We’ll see what happens next. I suspect it’ll be exciting.

I had to run inside and throw on a sweater and that said it all for me.

HP - WIN_20140218_221230

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Comments
  1. Nadia H. says:

    Mr Man, hope your ride up to MD is smooth with no bumps. I know this is a huge deal for you, but I suspect you”ll settle in just fine. Look out MD, Lee’s coming!

    • sirtilc42 says:

      Thanks. I don’t foresee bumps but I’ve allotted extra time for it just in case. I expect to settle in as well. Fortunately I have 9 days to pull myself together before I start working.

  2. Johnny says:

    Moving is the pits. Best thing to do in that situation is pack the valuable things you’d be worried about losing (tvs, cameras, jewelry, etc), put that stuff in your own ride, hire packets/movers, and go through the boxes at your new digs. Deciding what to throw out and what is sentimental saps not only your time but forward momentum. Before you know it that one box full of pictures/letters took an hour of time to go through.

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