I realize I haven’t written in a long time. I feel like I have abandoned an old friend.

I’ve kept myself a bit too busy and I haven’t had the usual quiet time that leads me into writing. That brief period in time where I had phone scammers came and went, so I haven’t had the opportunity to troll them and share with you. Either way, I find myself in my apartment on a quiet, lazy Sunday and before I knew it, I wound up on the computer.

Personal life:
I like my personal life. I keep things as peaceful and uncomplicated as I want to. When I speak with other people or read through my social media, I see people with so much chaos. I’m not so far removed from it that I don’t remember what it feels like, but I’m glad to have that not be my life. As I write, I’m listening to music and basking in the peaceful area I’ve managed to carve out since my relocation.

Thing is that I had left something incomplete in my personal life. It was always in the corner of my mind, nagging at me. Something I needed to accomplish, but I never bothered. The last few months found me quietly setting myself up to finally tackle this loose thread. I finally got all the pieces in order and am looking forward to starting. It will take up a nice chunk of my time, but after years of avoiding this, I’m looking forward to the challenge. I won’t share it until it’s done, but just know that I’m working on thes!

I realized how dull my life can get if I don’t have some goal or challenge. Without that, I feel as though I’m going through the motions of living, but wind up simply existing. I can’t lie, it’s going to be challenging, but I enjoy big wins. I’ve concluded that I can do anything I want to when I put in the work and effort.

Work life:
You know, the longer I am at my current job, the more I know. The more I know, the more disillusioned I am with the way things work. How much red tape exists is mind blowing. The environment of doing things a certain way simply because that’s how it has always been done confuses me. Though I’ve met some good people, I’ve also met some incredibly bad ones. Sadly, the bad ones are in the majority so it takes some adjusting. I thought it was something that could be changed from the inside and had considered being a part of that. Recently I came to the conclusion that it won’t work. Sometimes things are so broken that they can’t be put back together. I since resigned from 3 of the 4 committees I was on and I will be doing the same with the last one this coming week. It’s cool. I’ve learned a lot and met some good people. Perhaps it’s time to move on. I’ll keep an eye out for new opportunities.

Fitness:
I’m fat as fuck. I mean, all the weight I lost, I found. I’m also in pain on a regular basis. My foot, leg, knee or shoulder. It’s always something. This weekend I went to get an EMG test and then watch the very average Batman vs Superman flick.

emg

I had not been in so much discomfort since my nose surgery back in 1997. This examination was absolutely awful. It’s very difficult to relax and let the person do their job when it feels like you’re being tortured. In the usual one-upmanship that people tend to do, the receptionist said it couldn’t be as bad as her having given birth. I fought the urge and didn’t take the bait, but I really wanted to address that. Honestly, I was going through too much discomfort to bother.

921

Either way, it’s looking very probable that I may have had knee surgery unnecessarily and that my pains originate from my back and nerves instead. The possibility that I may finally have found something is exciting, but I do wonder if someone could be sued for this type of thing. Regardless, I have to meet with the doctor on Wednesday to go over the results of an MRI and the EMG. Who knows how much this weekend will cost me in medical bills! It seems very likely that I’m headed to yet another MRI, but this time for my back. If they can determine that my nerves are the cause of the pains and it’s treatable, I could actually be back to having an active lifestyle and losing weight quickly. I have too much of a bad attitude to also be fat.

If you’re keeping track, I have now done more X-Rays than I can even guesstimate, 3-4 MRI’s, a nuclear bone test, cortisone shots, years of physical therapy and an EMG test. This has drained my leave time at work, cost me a couple thousand dollars and I’m still in pain. I may very well be on the last leg (pun intended) of this process and, if I may be optimistic, on my way to finally being healthy again.

Romantic Life
I love all of you.

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